Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

Firstborn is very interested in foul language. He is enticed by the power of it. He wants to know all the words and of course we know he uses them around his 10 year old friends. But I am proud to say that he is usually proud enough to not use foul language around his parents or teachers (except in acrostic poetry).

Boy-next-door is also very curious. He is a bit better at keeping his mouth shut in dangerous situations though. A few months ago, I mentioned to his mother that Firstborn has been collecting nasty words because boy-next-door is "a collector" in Firstborn's terms. I think she felt threatened by this, though no threat was intended because she shot back at me that her son says that Firstborn knows more words for the F word than anyone he knows. This came as a bit of a shock to me at first and then it made sense. Apparently, some of the 4th grade boys were bragging that they knew the F word in Chinese and German and all kinds of other languages. Not that I would trust the veracity of their translations, but it all adds up.

So the other day in the minivan, Firstborn accused Lastborn of using a naughty word. It wasn't a terribly bad word and I explained that to the boys, but I also called Firstborn for throwing his brother in front of the bus like that.

"After all, Firstborn," I told him. Boy-next-door says you know more words for the F word than anyone he knows."

This silenced Firstborn just long enough for Lastborn to shout out, "Like B-E-E-P!"

Took me a moment to figure that one out. I almost had to pull of the road because of the laughter.