Paperback Writer often provides top 10 lists on her blog. Never have any of them been as entertaining as this one though.
10 great ways to waste time from bashing haggis, to making paper airplanes to an electronic kaleidoscope.
Monday, August 08, 2005
Friday, August 05, 2005
Lost a tooth
Firstborn lost a tooth last night at the bible school closing ceremony. I thought he was all done losing teeth. God knows when he will really be done.
So this brought back one of the funny stories from the days when I didn't have a blog to share.
When Firstborn was losing his first teeth, he was very impressed with the idea of the tooth fairy and the fact that no one had ever seen her. Firstborn decided that if he could catch the tooth fairy, he would become famous and be the richest boy in the world, and since Firstborn is very interested in being the richest person in the world, this seemed like a very good idea.
So, on a night where he had just lost a tooth, he sat at the dining room table covering a piece of paper with green marker. The entire piece was green. I asked him what he was making, and the flood gates opened.
He said, "I'm making a trap for the tooth fairy. I'm going to cover this with glue stick and then put my tooth on it and then the tooth fairy is going to come to get my tooth and she will get stuck to the pillow and not be able to fly away and I will wake up and she will be there and I will catch her and I will become rich and famous!"
Understand that in those days, Firstborn had the ability to talk while breathing in. So, all of this was said at a very rapid pace with no pause for us to set him straight.
Oh what the heck. We allowed him to carry the sticky sheet of green-colored paper up to his bed, place the tooth on it and then place his pillow over the fairy trap. The glue stick glue is completely washable after all.
The next morning, Firstborn was somewhat disappointed to find 3 foreign coins under his pillow. Knowing that Firstborn was a collector of coins, the tooth fairy liked to bring them for him instead of the traditional American ones.
When I asked Firstborn how his plot unfolded, he had totally moved on. He told me that the glue must have dried before she got there, but he had a better plan for next time he lost a tooth.
Next time, he was going to get a bottle, fill the bottom with glue that doesn't dry and then drop the tooth in. She would have to go into the bottle to get the tooth, but she would never be able to come out. Later in the day, he had even devised some trip wire corking system in his mind so that if the glue didn't work, he would have a back up plan.
At this point, I felt it was important to remind him that the tooth fairy doesn't bring money to little boys who scheme.
So this brought back one of the funny stories from the days when I didn't have a blog to share.
When Firstborn was losing his first teeth, he was very impressed with the idea of the tooth fairy and the fact that no one had ever seen her. Firstborn decided that if he could catch the tooth fairy, he would become famous and be the richest boy in the world, and since Firstborn is very interested in being the richest person in the world, this seemed like a very good idea.
So, on a night where he had just lost a tooth, he sat at the dining room table covering a piece of paper with green marker. The entire piece was green. I asked him what he was making, and the flood gates opened.
He said, "I'm making a trap for the tooth fairy. I'm going to cover this with glue stick and then put my tooth on it and then the tooth fairy is going to come to get my tooth and she will get stuck to the pillow and not be able to fly away and I will wake up and she will be there and I will catch her and I will become rich and famous!"
Understand that in those days, Firstborn had the ability to talk while breathing in. So, all of this was said at a very rapid pace with no pause for us to set him straight.
Oh what the heck. We allowed him to carry the sticky sheet of green-colored paper up to his bed, place the tooth on it and then place his pillow over the fairy trap. The glue stick glue is completely washable after all.
The next morning, Firstborn was somewhat disappointed to find 3 foreign coins under his pillow. Knowing that Firstborn was a collector of coins, the tooth fairy liked to bring them for him instead of the traditional American ones.
When I asked Firstborn how his plot unfolded, he had totally moved on. He told me that the glue must have dried before she got there, but he had a better plan for next time he lost a tooth.
Next time, he was going to get a bottle, fill the bottom with glue that doesn't dry and then drop the tooth in. She would have to go into the bottle to get the tooth, but she would never be able to come out. Later in the day, he had even devised some trip wire corking system in his mind so that if the glue didn't work, he would have a back up plan.
At this point, I felt it was important to remind him that the tooth fairy doesn't bring money to little boys who scheme.
Baby's got Blue Eyes
Yesterday, someone asked Lastborn where he got those beautiful blue eyes.
He responded with some disgust "I've always had them."
I need to teach him to say "Walmart!"
He responded with some disgust "I've always had them."
I need to teach him to say "Walmart!"
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
California Barking Spiders
On the way home from Bible School today, I mentioned to the kids that Daddy would be back from California tomorrow.
Firstborn: Yay! Do you think he will bring any barking spiders home with him?
Mom: Something tells me he will
Lastborn: Barking Spiders!!! Will we get to look at them?
Mom: I think he'll keep them hidden but I'm sure you will be able to hear them bark quite often.
By now, both boys are laughing so hard that it's a good thing they have seat belts to hold them in.
Hooray for the fart joke. At least it keeps them from fighting for a few minutes.
PS. My spell check does not like the word Fart. Excuse me while I check my Merrium Webster. I was under the distinct impression that fart is indeed a word that one can use in Scrabble. So why does this spell check not accept it? Hmmmmm.
Firstborn: Yay! Do you think he will bring any barking spiders home with him?
Mom: Something tells me he will
Lastborn: Barking Spiders!!! Will we get to look at them?
Mom: I think he'll keep them hidden but I'm sure you will be able to hear them bark quite often.
By now, both boys are laughing so hard that it's a good thing they have seat belts to hold them in.
Hooray for the fart joke. At least it keeps them from fighting for a few minutes.
PS. My spell check does not like the word Fart. Excuse me while I check my Merrium Webster. I was under the distinct impression that fart is indeed a word that one can use in Scrabble. So why does this spell check not accept it? Hmmmmm.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Learn to last 5 to 10 minutes longer in bed
This was the title of a junk mail I received this afternoon and it made me laugh a bit. First of all, I don't think they planned on sending it to a woman, because frankly, we don't often have that problem.
Secondly, it struck me how that presents a totally different picture to me now that I have kids than it would have pre-kids. Just how are they proposing I last 5 to 10 minutes longer in bed? Isn't that something I do every day when awakened by the childish voice saying "Can I get up now, Mommy?" Just 10 more minutes. Puleeeese.
Something tells me that if I were to click on that link I would not end up finding solutions to get my kids to sleep longer.
Tee Hee.
Secondly, it struck me how that presents a totally different picture to me now that I have kids than it would have pre-kids. Just how are they proposing I last 5 to 10 minutes longer in bed? Isn't that something I do every day when awakened by the childish voice saying "Can I get up now, Mommy?" Just 10 more minutes. Puleeeese.
Something tells me that if I were to click on that link I would not end up finding solutions to get my kids to sleep longer.
Tee Hee.
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