Inventive spelling

Driving firstborn to school. There's only 2.5 days left!!!

He's quizzing me on mineral facts. A very rude habbit. I've tried to explain to him that not everybody knows the painful details of minerals, crystals and other forms of compacted dirt, but he persists in asking me questions and then laughing because I don't know the answer. So I decided to make my point by turning the tables.

Mom: So Firstborn. How do you spell Mississippi?

Firstborn: M-i-s-s-i ....
No! It's M-R-S-dot um.



I couldn't figure out where he thought the R came from until he stuck that dot in. Being from MA we often get misled as to whether there is an R in a word or not. But Mrs.-ippi! Perfect!

Air conditioners and cold spells

So this past week, we had a heat wave. Not just any heat wave. This one came complete with 99.9999999% humidity. I ran my mother's group annual yard sale fundraiser this weekend and we all almost died. No one has peed in the northeast in days because we are all sweating too much.

So when I got home after said yard sale on Saturday, I begged and pleaded with DH to install the air conditioner. Frankly, I don't think anyone wants to be around either me or my children in this type of weather. So that was probably incentive enough.

DH warned me that if he put in the air conditioners we would get a cool spell. After 7 days of heat and humidity in mid June, it's hard to imagine what cold would be.

But now I know. Because today, it got up to 75! I need to run upstairs and put on some long pants now....

Knock, Knock

Firstborn: Mommy! Knock, Knock (he's already giggling)
Mom: Who's there (clutching her coffee).
Firstborn: Lapis!
Mom: Lapis who? (not that I don't know)
Firstborn: Lapis Lazuli! It's a rock that I heard about last year when I was first learning about gems alksdjf lkj fl ;adjf al ljdf kj lj asjf lfj a;jf ; ;jf lkdfj a;hooij l;ajdf ;how lkdjf;j ...

The rest is just a blur. I was holding my first cup of coffee. I'm not sure an entire summer of trivial facts on rocks, gems, minerals, crystals, stalactites and stalagmites, coal, jet, amber and other formations of dirt is bearable.

An imitation of what they see

Lastborn: "If I was my Star Wars book, where would I be?"

This is the acceptable replacement for

"Mommy, Where is my Star Wars book?"

To which, he would hear,

"I don't know. I'm not responsible for your Stars Wars Book."

It's amazing how the things we say seem so trivial until we hear them out of the mouths of our kids, over and over again.